When we truly recognize that at least part of the unsatisfactoriness we experience in life comes out of the way "I" am, and when we are sincere in our desire to change, then the groundwork is laid for a spiritual solution to the problem of suffering. We aren't going to get anywhere as long as we wriggle out of this recognition. Discipline is the key.
The first discipline enters with dignity and simplicity: we must be willing to stop, pause, and look at our priorities as they are expressed in how we occupy ourselves in our daily lives—what we are doing with our precious time and with our equally precious Self dwelling hidden beneath the surface of our lives. Most of us have been running for so long on old habit tendencies that this first discipline is a real challenge, far more difficult than sliding along with the old status quo no matter how unsatisfactory it can be at times. The first discipline requires that we set some limits so that we can find periods of "alone time" for simply being. We don't want to set ourselves up for failure; we have to look realistically at the demands in our lives to find a window for spiritual practice. Someone gave me a quotation by a Christian mystic who comments that "most of the time one-half hour was sufficient for quiet contemplation, unless one were too busy to fit this in. Then one hour was needed." The excuse that we are "too busy" won't wash here. One Buddhist master taught that if you have time to breathe you have time to meditate.
How can meditation, mindfulness, and self-knowledge be that important, as important as breathing? The truth is that we are more than simply this body/mind we identify with. The longing of the heart knows this—that longing for the deepest harmony and peace that come from digging beneath the surface of life. No matter how much we turn away from looking at it, we can't escape the inevitability of impermanence. No matter how hard we try to hang on to a person, a position, a possession that supports our sense of worth and self-esteem, it's not going to last. We are not going to last—the "we" that identifies with the physical body and mind accompanying us into this life. They are the vehicles for learning the lessons needed to grow in spirit. We must see that in clinging to them we are holding on to temporary supports that cannot provide the security promised. Thus the first discipline keeps bringing us back to being without distractions so that we can begin to see how our reliance on this or that leads us down roads of suffering. We simply have to be willing to find space/time within our lives to return to the Truth of who we really are, which is elusive and remains hidden because of our busyness.
My first spiritual teacher used to say, "The pearl of great price has a price." The pearl of great price brings "the peace that surpasseth understanding," the quiet or exuberant joy that comes when we touch the place of spiritual truth—the reality that is the very source of our being. It is indescribable, ineffable. As one of my teachers said, "It can't be taught, but it can be caught." The great spiritual teachers can only point the way because it is right within our body-mind that the confusion and the solution lie. This is the second discipline, maintaining or sustaining our spiritual practice no matter how daunting it can seem. It builds upon the first discipline, and must keep building upon it. It is said in our tradition, "It is hard to keep the initial intention/humility to the end." The body/mind seems to have an agenda that takes precedence over the spiritual. Our desire for comfortable, easy, and familiar lives will keep challenging the clarity of our initial intention to scrutinize our old ways of being. We are moving from the known into the unknown, which may appear murky and unclear, uncomfortable and not easy. A half-hearted effort brings half-hearted results at best. The old patterns, karmic patterns registered on this body/mind, have a power that seems independent of us. This is simply not so, but we won't really be able to extricate ourselves until we build the growing faith to keep at our spiritual practice.
Such faith and practice do not require us to blindly follow a dogma. So the third discipline is our willingness to put down pride and self-protectiveness, and take refuge in a teacher and spiritual community. Taking Sangha Refuge offers us support, guidance, and fellowship with like-minded practitioners. A spiritual teacher is a tremendous help because he or she has done the training, and gone down the path with its obstacles and perplexities. No one can do this work for us. However, the guidance of a teacher can help us keep going and see where our blind spots have taken us off course. The Christian teaching that "the Truth will make you free" would certainly be echoed by the Buddha. That Truth is not intellectual, not conceptual, not graspable; and it can be caught—though perhaps "touched" is the better word. The miracle of training is that we can move beyond our current limitations and change in ways that bring less suffering to ourselves and others. The Truth lies at the very core of our being, and every time we have the determination to choose to live the spiritual life of a disciplined practice, we come nearer to finding it for ourselves. As Bodhidharma taught, "It is not so very far away." It is right here, the very source of life—not just "my" life, but all life. It is the Truth of Oneness that embraces the diversity and multiplicity we get caught up in. Nothing has to be excluded, while the clarity of our continuing practice will throw light on where we want to change, and give us the courage of faith to try out new ways. Keeping up the three disciplines is an endless training of continuing riches and surprises.